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GMD Verdict  

Review of The Lost Planet: Zeqet Erelium V
"Possibly the best map in gloom."
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Map Name   The Lost Planet: Zeqet Erelium V (speedse.bsp)
Map Version   13/12/01
Map Author   R1CH
Web page   Click here.
Download   speedse.zip (1.3mb)
 
Reviewer   Cataclaw
Reviewed on   Fri Dec 14 09:43:46 2001
This map earns the GMD Seal of Approval!

You have never played a game of gloom like one played on The Lost Planet: Zeqet Erelium V. I guarantee you. In fact, this is possibly the best map in gloom, ever. After the release of Speed.bsp which swept the community off it's feet, R1CH decided it was time to prove his skill as a gloom mapper and create a second version of Speed. R1CH did not disapoint.

In the visuals department, this map scores a respectable 4 cubes, and would even score a 5th if the review script allowed it. Flashing disco lights, custom AOL textures, techno music, "all your base" sound effects and more. This map has it all. There is enough visual eye-candy in this map to feed a small country for a decade. Other dazzling special effects include "Evil Depot", a mysterious creature that poisons nearby humans and halts their progress into spider territory.



In terms of gameplay, the map scores big with unique base designs. The spider base is located on an extremely fast, rotating platform. This design in itself is a great defense against humans and grenades. The rotating base will make humans so dizzy, they'll end up walking into a spiker or other defensive structure. The human base is strategically set up to prevent kami attacks. With each starting teleporter located in a seperate "room", spiders will find it close to impossible to wipe out the entire base at once!

To further the gameplay experience, R1CH added a secret back-door entrance to the human base. That silly AOL poster on the wall actually opens to reveal a hidden passage when a button is pressed from the spider's side.

To sum it all up, SpeedSE is a fantastic map, made by one of the most respected mappers and members of the community. We only hope R1CH's next offering will continue to amaze us and offer hours of fun-filled action.


Yes, this was a joke.



User comments:
Sheer genius! - Cataclaw
i knew if i used the techno music it would make a good map! - R1CH
omg omg omg download it now! - Evil Kai
Amazing! This map should be on the upcoming Gloom v1.4 distribution. - Ankka
Gloom v1.4? No my friend this map is destined for an appearance in Gloom... - SIphon3D [more]
/me humps SpeedSE - Saig
Eat shit you name stealing fucktard - Real Saig
Lol its completely unplayable and everything, but its cool! - Gryt
NOOO NOT ANOTHER!! - Stannum
My god, it's full of stars! - hatecrimes
Must make exessive sarcasm because it never gets old! MORE SARCASM MORE SARCASM! - HOB
/me is blind - Skype
i like siege! - real saig-2
errm... the music's excellent! - gauss
Thank heaven for the sweet, sweet release of death. - CTF
Gotta love the amusement of AOL in there - Darkraptor
Jesus Christ... that is the worst pile of puke it have ever seen..... - {DaRk}Defiler [more]
omg.. i just vetoed it onto onecall and people *liked* it... in a weird sort o... - R1 [more]
I canotn see a ucfking thgni jessu chrsit nwe colros plsaea! - BoB
SKL:DJFDSK:LJF - Saig(for real)
Cool !! - [RN]Devil
The review is sarcastic right? :D - Sider
this map owns, even though i got a ceisure while playing it - Smalls
haven't played it yet, but it makes me jizz in my pants thinking about it! - Titan
I give Cataclaw 4 cubes in the 'ass-kissing' category - Jher
Cataclaw you forgot to put the tag there... - Krybosis
... - ThePyro
I think its seizure... - hoa-Pyroman
OMG, excellent use of texture and stunning visuals, great gameplay througo... - Damien [more]
R1ch and I are going out now, he's a sexy boy. Sexy sexy sexy Dicky boy. - Cataclaw.
How the fuck this map got higher than a 1 in the user-ratings is beyond me... - Saig Again
Er, how did the person 2 replies above manage to copy my name... - Cataclaw2
Cataclaw ne Cataclaw. - omghaxbot
This map induces orgasm be careful - Brolli
The sequel:Crates, crates, crates and more crates. - Stnanum
This review broke the record for # of comments. LO!L!! !! - Crazy
woo woo speedse! - ender
yes weäry good - kriss
ok, i give it a 5... because it sucks so much... but it's funny, i like th... - Ranger [more]
pr0n? - FLuXx
My eyes! The goggles do nothing! - jitspoe
IM BLIINNDDD !! BLIIINNDDDDDD!!!!! - Xenoid
How Many Beers Must You Drink To Make a Review Like That? - Switen
Best map ever. <---that's a period - KrillinJR
It's better than most.. - Jojo
ugly. nauseating. fun. - acidrain
Omg the goat is almost ready to bare it's children. Fetch the farm, f... - |BM|Sciphi [more]
Nice map, but nothing to wet yourself about - s1q
Spelling doesn't count, numbers do! - Ingmar
I love to rape boys to the ambience of this map. - Saigf0ck
I love naked guys... - Niklas Alm
ive never played it :( - evilfish
Retina burning goodness in every bite - Orc
Though this map got a good review...so did hitlars speaches. - [MerC]Agent
This is by far the worst map I've ever seen in my life. - Kick-@$$
This map gives me more orgasms than a big hairy cock in my ass. I like penis. - Cataclaw,
Good Game play. I'll sue you for my eyes though. - PurrNaK
die quick. - makaveli
loks fun... unless its that REALLY annoying level with part of STG in it... b... - BuG [more]
have the best time of ur life!Go! Wild If U Like - death

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Comment on this review:

Average rating for The Lost Planet: Zeqet Erelium V: 5.4/10

Rate-O-Map™

Total: 102 ratings
 
Textures
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Comment: R1CH has used a variety of custom textures, which earns the map a lot of points in this category. I'm especially fond of the AOL texture. The lighting and sound add a great deal of ambience to the map, it gives the map a certain special feel.

Layout
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Comment: The layout is sheer genius. Strategically placed base locations, hallways and clever "backdoor" entrances provide both teams with great tactical options. Overall, the layout is fantastic.

Creativity
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Comment: This is officially the most creative gloom map -- ever. Rotating spider bases, evil depots, slippery surfaces, disco lights, techno music -- it all adds up to form the masterpiece that is "The Lost Planet: Zeqet Erelium V"

Overall
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Comment: This map sets the standards for which other maps are judged. Period.
This review has been read 3559 times. The Gloom Map Depository is copyright Team GMD. Quake2 is a registered trademark of Id Software. Gloom is copyright Team Reaction. The review script is copyright R1CH.